What I’ve Learned About Leadership: Real Talk from the Trenches
Let’s be honest – leadership isn’t all champagne moments & LinkedIn glory posts. It’s rewarding, yes, but also challenging, messy & deeply human.
After years of working with leadership teams, owning businesses, & now teaching EOS®, I’ve seen it all — the highs, the lows, & the real stuff that makes or breaks a great leader. So I thought I’d share a few personal insights that might resonate, especially if you’re in the thick of it right now.
Letting Go Is the Hardest Part
One of the biggest challenges I’ve faced? Letting go.
As a business owner, it’s tempting to think no one can do it like you. I’ve been there. But I’ve learned that delegating & elevating is essential if you want to grow — not just your business, but your people too.
Sure, their 100% might feel like your 80%, or maybe they approach it completely differently… but that doesn’t make it wrong. It frees you up to focus on what you love & what you’re great at.
✨ Leadership insight: Clarity is the magic ingredient. I had to learn to communicate better — slowing down, saying less but with more intent, & making sure my expectations were crystal clear. Boundaries & measurables give people the freedom to succeed on their own terms.
How I Became a Leader (Hint: I Didn’t Plan It)
I fell into leadership. Literally.
Working in a biomedical lab, mistakes were happening far too often, so I put my hand up to fix it. That led to becoming a team leader. I had no formal training at the time, but I had a knack for motivating people & cutting through the noise.
From there, I moved through sales roles, pitched myself into a Sales & Marketing Manager position, & just kept raising my hand whenever I thought I could make a difference. No master plan, just curiosity & courage.
A Day in My Life: Structure = Freedom
My days start early — 5.30 am kind of early. I’ve learned that if you don’t design your day, someone else will.
My morning includes coffee (made by my husband – bonus points), gratitude journaling, a walk with our mini schnauzers Apollo & Hermes, & a PT session or longer walk.
By 7.30 am, I’m prepped for a full day of client sessions. After work, it’s another dog walk, dinner, a puzzle or Netflix (yes, I wind down like a normal human), journaling, & planning the next day.
💡 Top tip: I block out time in my calendar for everything — fitness, family time, even reading & saxophone practice. It sounds rigid, but it actually gives me more choice & freedom. Life by design.
Recent Reminder: Fill Your Own Cup
I used to say yes to everything. Sound familiar?
Eventually, I realised that neglecting my own energy — my health, relationships, passions — was doing no one any favours. You can’t pour from an empty cup.
So now, I plan Clarity Breaks, time out, holidays, & “me time” before the year even starts. Everything that recharges me gets booked in — non-negotiable.
Game-Changing Book
‘Get a Grip’ by Gino Wickman & Mike Paton, followed by ‘Traction’, were leadership game-changers for me.
I was already doing bits of EOS in my business, but those books gave it structure. They helped me build real accountability, elevate my team, & ultimately… let go. Now I use the EOS tools every day — in my business & with clients.
One Piece of Advice for Young Leaders
Put your hand up. Don’t wait to be ready — just be willing.
But also, don’t pretend to know it all. Ask for help. It’s not weakness — it’s wisdom. People genuinely want to help. You feel good helping others, right? Don’t deny someone else that gift.
Leadership Is Like Rugby (Seriously)
Here’s a visual I always come back to.
Imagine playing a game of rugby without knowing the rules. You’d end up with a bunch of grown adults doing interpretive dance on the field. Funny for a bit, but not productive.
In business, if people don’t know how to win, what the rules are, or where the goalposts lie, they get frustrated. Or bored.
✨ Lesson: Be clear on the vision. Define what success looks like. Set boundaries. Build a game plan. Then you can play full out & celebrate the wins – champagne optional, but highly encouraged.
Final Thoughts
Leadership isn’t about being the smartest or the loudest. It’s about being clear, staying curious, building trust, & creating space for others to shine.
That’s what I’ve learned, sometimes the hard way.
And if you’re navigating your own leadership journey & want some structure, clarity & practical tools to build a better business & better life — that’s where EOS comes in.
Here is the link to my interview with Jonno White if you want to learn more:
👉 Curious about how EOS could support you or your leadership team? Let’s have a chat.
Written by Debra Chantry-Taylor, FBA Accredited Family Business Advisor, Certified EOS Implementer & Founder of Business Action.
Business Action is focused on helping Entrepreneurs lead better lives, through creating a better business. We have a small team of accredited family business advisors, EOS Implementers & Leadership coaches, as well as access to a huge range of advisors through our Trusted Partners Network.
